The sheet

So that when the day comes, nobody in your family has to decide anything with swollen eyes.

My father left my mother a signed note saying he did not want a mass. There was no mass. My sister had no time to leave anything, and what always happens, happened.

This is that note. Fill it in, print it, sign it, and give a copy to whoever should have one. Ten minutes now will save the people you love a terrible week.

There are no right answers, and you don’t have to fill it all in. Whatever you leave blank, they will decide. Whatever you write, they won’t have to.

Nothing you write here leaves your computer. There is no account, no database, and nothing is ever sent to any server. What you write stays in this browser, and you can download a copy to keep wherever you like.

Saved on this device only, so you can close the tab and come back. If this is a shared computer, untick it.

Who I am
What I want done with my body
Where I want to end up

A place, a kind of place, or none in particular. “Any tree will do” is a perfectly good answer.

The ceremony
I want a mass or religious ceremony
I want a wake or funeral home viewing
Who decides if there is any doubt

One person only, so nobody has to argue. Tell them before you write it down here.

What I want played, said, or not said

Music, a text, a line. Or the opposite: something you would rather nobody said.

What I have heard my people say

This part isn’t about you. People say what they want all the time — at the table, grumbling, half joking — and then it counts for nothing because nobody wrote it down. Write it down yourself. Who said it, and what they said.

Signature
Signature